This is life now.

Going to bed at 4 a.m. Waking up an hour, maybe two hours before work if I’m lucky. Staying in my pajamas all weekend because showering signals to my body that it’s time to Go To Work. When I’m at work, I love it. When I’m not, I…don’t? This too shall pass. Everything is scary and new. I’m scared and new. I’ll find my footing. 

I miss D.C. so much it hurts. Need to visit. Even just watching Scandal and knowing full well it’s not filmed in the DMV and knowing Metro stations are not all bright and cheerful but hearing my old red line – Shady Grove  – stop made my heart flutter. 

I thought I’d be young forever. 

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